I'm Still Alive! :)

HEY GUYS!

Long time no seeeeee!

I like talking in videos more than I like writing. Which doesn't make sense as to why I have a blog. I often ask myself, "Why do you still have a blog when all you do is post videos? Isn't that what a YouTube channel is for?" So go check out my YouTube channel, and watch this video to see my little update!

I love you all! :)

Stay strong!

화이팅!!

Forever Friends

Did you know that sometimes God answers prayers by placing specific people in your life? I would know because he placed someone very special in mine. 

About 6 months ago I noticed this guy posting the most adorable stuff in the Waiting For a Missionary page on facebook. I would comment on them and that's how we started talking. This just so happened to be during a time that I really needed some answers in my life. And it just so happens that that's when Jordan and I became friends. 

At first I thought he was just an awesome missionary boyfriend who liked to talk a lot, play guitar/sing, and watch New Girl. But then I started to realize that he was someone special in my life. I remember one day very vividly. I had been crying all day, and praying for an answer that I needed to a question that I'd had for a very, very long time. Jordan didn't know anything about what was going on. That night he texted me, and what he said was the exact answer that I was hoping for. 

God places people in our lives for specific reasons, and during specific times. I believe I met Jordan exactly when I needed to. And I know that for a fact.

A couple days ago, Jordan found out that he gets to return to his mission in California in just 3 days. He had previously been sent home due to some serious medical issues, and is now SO excited to be able to return. The happiness of Buddy The Elf doesn't even some up how happy I am for him. He's wanted this for so long. 

When I got the text during class saying that he'd be able to return, I was all:

And then I realized he'd be leaving and I wouldn't have him to talk to 24/7 anymore. My reaction quickly changed..

Let me explain. One thing that makes my friendship with Jordan so special is that he fulfills that 24/7 support and comfort that I always got from Jared. Of course I still turn to Jared for mostly everything, but when I can only hear from him once a week, that it makes it a little harder. And Jordan is the only person who has been able to do that in such a way that Jared would. And whenever I was having a tough day, or wished I could just talk to Jared, Jordan was the one who would remind me how much Jared loves me, and how proud Jared is of me. So it's almost like I was hearing it from Jared himself. I know that doesn't make much sense but it makes sense in my head.. Basically, I'm just insanely grateful for him.

The thing that's hardest for me is having to say goodbye... I can't handle saying goodbye to people I love anymore.. Saying bye to Jared was the hardest thing I've ever done. But now I have to say bye to the person I became closest with since Jared left? Not cool :(

I don't think Jordan realizes how much I look up to him, and the wonderful example that he is to me. He truly is one of the best people I've ever met. Hands Down. His heart is so pure, and full of love. I hope someday to be more like him. He faces trials that no one should have to face. And yet, he always comes out stronger. He really is one of the strongest, most faithful people I know. And more than anything, he's like the big brother that I always wanted. I have been blessed with a brother at this time in my life when I needed one most. And I can't describe how grateful and blessed I feel to have the best "brother" ever. 

I know that he is going to return to the mission field and be the best missionary that mission has ever seen.

Although my heart is breaking, and many tears have been shed, and I don't want to say goodbye, I know our friendship will always be there. I know that we're best friends for life. I know God placed him in my life for a reason. And I know that I'll see him again.  

Love you Jordan.  

10 Months Down

I'm about 4 days late this with this post. But I figured better late than never, right?

My love, my sweetheart, my other half has been gone for 10 months! The fact that we're finally in double digits kinda makes my head hurt. I'm finally getting to that stage where I catch myself thinking, "I swear he just left..."

During this last month I moved back to Hawaii. Which is where Jared and I met, exactly 2 years ago this month. So I'm constantly feeling like we just barely met here a year ago. When really, it's been two. Which just goes to show that time really does fly by. 

I've been really struggling with being here without him. The place we met. The place where my life completely changed. The place where I fell in love with the man of my dreams. I see him everywhere and in everything. We spent the first 6 months of our relationship here on the beach, at the temple, on campus, and just loving the fact that we finally found each other. We both knew something was missing in our lives. We just didn't know what. Until we met each other <3

Safe to say I fall more in love with him every single day. 

He has my whole heart. Always and forever.

Perspective is Everything

Sometimes I think to myself, "Dang, I'm glad I don't have to worry about getting letters every week from my missionary. That must be hard always dealing with the anxiety of wondering if it'll arrive on the day you expect, or constantly checking the mailbox. Sure glad I don't have to deal with that." 

Or, "Email chatting must be so hard.. Cuz you're constantly having to say 'bye' again." It's crazy to think though that those are all things I wanted SO desperately at one time.

Being a missionary girlfriend is all about perspective. 

I can't emphasize that enough.

 I like to think that I've had enough experience with this whole "waiting" thing to understand it a lot better than I did in the beginning. It's true, when Jared stopped writing letters every week it was hard. I got really sad. But I accepted it and made not receiving letters the new "normal" for me. And you know what? That made all the difference. I was able to change my perspective into a positive one. I decided that not getting them every week is almost like a blessing. I don't get anxious about checking the mail, I don't worry about what day it might show up, etc.. Now whenever I get a letter, it's an amazing surprise! My perspective completely changed. But it's not something that just happens. It's something you need to sit down and decide, "I am going to feel this way about this situation" and then work on it. Every single day. 

I challenge you to pray and ask the Lord to help you view hard situations differently. I promise you He will. He wants you to be happy! But He wants you to do your part. It's okay to have those hard days that we all have every once in a while. Just the other night I spent in my bed with ice cream while watching A Walk to Remember and missing my sweetheart more than anything. That's fine. That's perfectly healthy. But if that's what you're doing all the time? Somethings gotta change or you are going to be miserable, and honestly? Your man might not even want to be with you when he gets home. Yeah, I just said that. It's SO important for us to be growing, and more important, for us to be happy. Happy people are the people who change the world :) 

It's easy to say, "Well it's so hard to be happy when .......... is happening" but it's also easy to change your perspective.

When I started to change my perspective about not getting to email chat, not receiving letters or packages often, etc is when I saw the most blessings in my life. We had a lesson in relief society where they challenged us to pray and ask Heavenly Father to be able to see more blessings in our lives. And oh my gosh, it worked beyond what I imaged! My life has never felt so full of blessings, and so beautiful. The more you recognize your blessings, the more your trials and struggles will seem smaller and smaller.  

The Power of Re framing Situations:

It's true that there are some missionary girlfriends who spend the whole two years trying to figure out how to get by without having their man there. The girls who don't know how to be happy without them. I was one of those girls at one point. But then there are the girls who know how to enjoy life, actually enjoy the wait, and wake up happy and ready to go out and change the world as best they can. I always wanted to be one of those happy girls. And although I'm still working on it, I know I'm definitely headed down that road because of the change in perspective I made. The power of re framing things cannot be overstated. There can be two girls, doing the exact same thing, same activity (not receiving letters, not getting along with his parents, not being able to be happy, etc..) But one of them feels sad or depressed, and the other one - with just a small change in perspective, feels wonderful.

Now one might ask, "Well how do I help myself change my perspective?" Well, there are lots of different ways. 

What Should You Do?

1. Don't talk about what makes you sad. If you don't receive letters often, don't vocally voice it. It's been proven that what you call your struggles actually effects how you react to them. 
2. Literally change the way you think about "waiting."  I don't even like that word. I like to say, preparing. For example, say you're driving and you come up to a toll crossing and have to pay a decent amount of money just to cross and continue on your way. It could be easy to get upset and wonder why you need to pay money to the government just to help with stupid things that don't effect you, like public transportation or something. Now lets pretend the toll booth on the very left is an express lane. You have to pay twice as much to go through, but all the money you pay goes to a charity of your choice. More people are likely to chose the one that gives to charity, even though they're paying more money. Now what's my point with this example? Everyone still has to pay to get through the toll crossing. But the perspective on where their money is going to is what makes the difference between happy people and upset people. Now apply this principal to our "waiting" or I like to say, "preparing" process. Look at WHY you support your missionary. WHY he's out there serving, and the more you think about that, the more you realize what it is he's truly doing, it becomes that much easier to be happy and see it as a blessing more than as a sacrifice. 
3. Don't. Get. Discouraged. I'm not saying to run around and dance like a fairy all the time because life is so good. It's totally normal to have those bad days, like I said. But when things that normally get you discouraged start happening more than once, don't let yourself keep getting down. Remember that there's always a better way to look at the situation. Here's a wonderful example :)

I'd just like to end with these two videos because I think they're pretty great :) I just want to reiterate that YOU have the power to change the way you think and react to what might seem like trials or struggles. I think sometimes the Lord hands us what we might think is a trial. I like to imagine the Lord handing me a lump of clay. At first it looks impossible. "What am I supposed to do with this? That other girl got a barbie. And I got a lump of clay?" I might ask. But the Lord might just want to see what I come up with and how to handle the "trial." I could sit there and cry about having clay and no barbie, or I could get out my tools, and create the most beautiful sculpture :) and if it's not beautiful? At least I will have tried. Because it's my clay. My sculpture. And I can do whatever I want with it. The Lords plan is always better than our own, and sometimes His plan looks a lot like a lump of clay. How I use it, and what I do with it, is all up to me. We all only get one lump of clay. How will you look at yours?

Finally,

Pray to Heavenly Father and ask him to be able to see more blessings in your life, and ask for help to change your perspective about hard situations. He will help you.

You could live life like this:

or by changing your perspective, you could live like this:) 

"Open When" Letters :)

Happy Holidays!!! :)
I've been working on these Open When letters for a couple weeks now. I had about 15 ideas written down but I only ended up doing 8 because it's finals week and the end of the semester is just too busy. And I'm such a perfectionist and if I know I don't have the time required to make them as good as I want them to be, I just won't even try haha. With that being said, I can't believe it's the end of the semester already! My mind is blown. Time flies. Is anyone else wondering how the heck this semester went by so quickly? Christmas is in 20 days!! I get to (hopefully) be there to Skype my sweetheart in only 20 days! And then, I leave for Hawaii in 27 days! I've been counting down to those two dates so much lately that I haven't even looked at my Jared countdown. I've found that counting down to little events along the way helps soooooo much. 

Anyway! Here are the letters I did for this package. Keep in mind, I will be sending more eventually :) 

Open When...

1. You get this package
2.  You're going to sleep
3. You're bored
4. You need to be reminded how much I love you <3
5. You need a laugh :)
6. On New Years Eve!
7. You're sick
8. You had a hard day/Need motivation

I also put some items inside the envelopes along with the letters. If you want to see some of the cool stuff I put in the letters, you can watch this video :)
I'm really excited for him to open them :) I'll be posting soon about everything I sent him for Christmas. 

 

Get to Know Me

I decided to do a post of 50 things that most people might not know about me :) You obviously know I'm a missionary girlfriend, but that's only part of who I am :) So here are a bunch of random facts about me.

My name is Desiree! :)

1. I was born in Las Vegas and have lived in multiple different states and countries. I guess you could say that's why I hate staying in one place too long. Traveling has been distilled in me ever since I was little.

2. I absolutely love candy stores. Whenever I'm walking around a city and see a candy store, especially in foreign countries, I HAVE to go in. I actually think a perfect date as well. Take me to a candy store and I'm a happy camper :) 

(candy porn right there ^)

3. I would love to get married in September or October :) 

4. I'm not really a party person. I don't exactly enjoy going out to parties. I'd rather go on a walk under the stars with just one person, and have some good conversation, rather than being surrounded by a ton of people. 

5. I have the smallest stomach in the world. I can never completely finish a hamburger, or most of my meals for that matter. I get full after a few bites and then I have to wait a bit before I can continue eating. 

6. My favorite words are: Harvest & Serendipity.

7. I document EVERYTHING through video. Literally, everything. (ie killing spiders, cool looking meals, conversations with my mish, my thoughts, etc...)

8. I'd rather have conversation with kids than adults.

9. I hate confrontation and arguing. Like, more than anything in the world. I'm a very passive person and I just can't handle it. I have to leave the room because I hate arguing back with someone.

10. I have to drink orange juice every morning with my breakfast :) 

11. For the past 4 years, I listen to The Main Title from The Notebook one time through before falling asleep every night. Music is very important to me and helps in so many different ways. In this way, it helps me prepare to fall asleep :)

Click here for a link to the song

12. I am mildly dyslexic. Which causes me to be terrible at math, spelling, and reading out loud.

13. I absolutely hate flying. I'm constantly imagining ways the plane could crash. Yeah, It's a problem.

14. My favorite song of all time is Here Comes The Sun by The Beatles. If you've never heard it, I'm sorry, and here's the link to listen to it.

Here Comes the Sun - The Beatles

15. I am a perfectionist. 

16. Purple, teal, and champagne pink are my favorite colors :)

 

17. I am a somewhat reserved and shy person. A lot of people think I'm not a nice or friendly person because of it. 

18. This basically describes me every time I check the mail.

19. Overcast is my favorite weather. I'm actually not a huge fan of sun.

20. I'm a night owl. Night time is when my mind is most creative and productive.

21. I listen to The Osmonds the way some girls listen to One Direction. And it's my dream to meet Donny Osmond.

22. My favorite city is Venice :)

23. I hate spiders with a passion... I know most people hate spiders. Especially girls. But me? I really REALLY hate them. 

24. I have a dad crush on Victor Garber and Denis Quaid.

25. I am obsessed with old movies! Especially Jerry Lewis. When I found Rock-A-Bye Baby was on YouTube I acted like a 13 year old girl meeting Justin Bieber. Click HERE to watch it. I promise you won't regret it. It's absolutely hilarious with an adorable love story :) 

26. I'm a snowcone and hot chocolate addict. During the summer I could get snowcones every day. And during winter, it's the same only with hot chocolate :)

27. I eat homemade popcorn (not the nasty microwave stuff) weekly, and I have to have my salt and vinegar seasoning to put on top. Basically anything salt and vinegar flavored is just amazing.

28. Besides the scriptures and textbooks, Nicholas Sparks books are the only ones I read.

29. I hate the word, "someday." ex: "We'll definitely go there someday!" It's just a word with not much promise to it.

30. I like making forts and camping in the living room :) I really don't think I'm a very high maintenance person. I've slept all night on an airport floor, lived without wifi or internet for weeks, went 4 months with no tv or hair straightener, plus more. I think life is more fun that way anyway :) 

31. Every time after I get gas, the first thing I do when I get back inside my car is put hand sanitizer on.

32. I have a constant love affair going on with Canon cameras.

33. I absolutely hate going out by myself.. Shopping, or even going to the post office. I prefer always having someone with me. I've been an extremely needy person ever since birth (my mom can attest to that).

34. I love cheese. Like.... a lot.

35. I don't know any other languages, but I can have full conversation in movie quotes.

36. The 4 months I spent teaching English in China were the best 4 months I've ever experienced in my life thus far.

37.  Half the music on my ipod is that of Nat King Cole, Sam Cook, Jimmy Durante, Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, Dean Martin, The Temptations, Barry Manilow, Rod Stewart, Steve Tyrell, Seal, Elvis, The Beatles, The O'Jays, Lionel Richie, etc.. Basically everything 80's and earlier. 

38. The Gospel and the church is everything to me. My reason for living. My happiness. And I honestly don't know who I'd be without it.

39. I've met Taylor Swift :)

40. I've ridden an elephant.

41. Autumn is my absolute favorite season :) Everything about it makes me so happy :)

42. One of my favorite parts about Thanksgiving is waking up in the morning to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade :)

43. I believe animals have feelings and emotions. Especially dogs.

44. I don't watch much TV. But when I do? It's gotta be Fresh Prince or Full House.

45. I never get sick of hearing songs on repeat. In fact, when I do homework I have to have one song on repeat the whole time. It drives my sister nuts, but it somehow helps me focus :)

46. I'm a hopeless romantic, but at the same time, I have issues believing in true love and happy marriages.

47. I had to go to the ER once for getting a pill stuck in my throat. 

48. This boy right here has my whole heart :)

49. One of my favorite pastimes is playing guitar :) 

50. And last but not least.......

6 MONTHS DOWN!

Wooohoooooooo!!! :D

I am so freaking excited. I'm writing this post a bit late, but I still figured I'd write it. On September 20th Jared hit his 6 month mark! Finally. It's about time. It definitely feels like it has taken forever to get to this point, but I'm just glad we're finally here :) I can testify that the first six are by far the hardest. So if you are in the first 6 months right now, just remember to look up, and know it will get easier :) I promise! So in my opinion, this is how the timeframe has broken down for me.

Months 1-3: 

So slow. So hard. But I at least got letters during the first two. I really struggled with learning how to live without him during these months. But can ya blame me? It's a major adjustment to make.

Month 4: 

A definite change from months 1-3. Went a lot faster and I finally starting learning how to be okay and happy without him here. My testimony also grew a ton during this month.

Month 5: 

Fastest month yet! I couldn't believe how fast it went. This month I realized and learned how to turn being sad, and missing him, into something positive. If any of you would like me to write a post about how I did that, let me know. I also realized that this time is about him, not me. It's all about him. And when you put it in that perspective, you won't be as sad about not getting letters or emails. But ultimately, month 5 has been the fastest and easiest yet :) 

Awesome stuff that's happened during these 6 months:

• Jared has his first baptism in his first area! :) 
• Jared was made District Leader in his second area :) 
• He was able to meet Elder Ballard 
• He has been able to become (in my opinion) completely fluent in Italian. Sometimes now he struggles to speak English... :) 
• I was able to spend the summer teaching English in Italy and Austria
• I received a calling as Sunday School teacher and I love it!
• I finally bought a nice camera and have started developing my passion for photography :) (a good thing to do while your mish is gone is develop talents and passions that you've always had but never done)
• My family moved to Provo :) (right across the street from the MTC)
• I got accepted to return to BYU-Hawaii in January :)
• I've met some amazing people who have made this wait such an easier process :) Ya'll know who you are ;)

There's a lot of other experiences I've had these 6 months that have just strengthened my testimony, and  also my love for Jared. I wouldn't change a thing :)

Here's my 6 months celebration video :) 

(don't judge the cheesiness of it. I'm a cheesy person, what can I say)

Busy Summer in Italy!

Hey Everyone! :) 

Yes, I'm still alive. Just in case any of you were wondering. I realized I haven't blogged in forever. But I have a good excuse (kind of) I promise. 

I moved to Italy June 5th and have been going, going, going non stop since then. I'm working here for the summer as a tutor/camp counselor at English camps all over Italy, and will be moving to Austria next week until August 13th. But that's besides the point :) I've just been so busy. Today is the first day in a month and a half that I've had time to sit down and relax. I haven't even had time to send Jared letters. Yeah, it's sad. We've been communicating primarily through email. But honestly, I really miss getting/sending letters.

I have so much I should update, so many stories and experiences I could share, but that would turn into a massive novel I know none of you would read, lets be honest. So I'll stick with the important stuff.

• Jared had his first baptism on June 1st and was asked to be the one to perform the baptism. He was beyond excited :)

• Teaching English over here in Italy has done wonders for making time pass. Not only is time going by quickly, but I've learned and grown so much just by living here. The only downside is that I haven't been able to attend church because my host families don't like driving far distances and the churches are always far away :( But there's always a positive way to look at a situation. I have realized the importance of attending church every single week, and how big of a blessing it is. I will never take it for granted again.

• Call me a little 13 year old girl, but I love Cody Simpson's music, and this song has been on repeat recently. "Wherever you are, no matter how far, I promise that I won't give up on you. They say 'out of sight' means 'out of mind' but that couldn't be further from the truth, because I'm in love with you. I'm still in love with you. Even if there is an ocean keeping your heart from mine, that doesn't mean I'm not thinking about you all of the time. I'm counting the days till I see you, and somewhere I know that you are too" He gets us MG's ;)

• Yesterday we hit 4 MONTHS DOWN! I can't believe it :) The first three went so slow, but the fourth just flew by. And what better place to celebrate than Venice, Italy? :) I am seriously so blessed to be having this much fun while he's gone. I'm living my dreams and couldn't be happier with everything in my life :) Waiting isn't about "waiting" It's about growing, changing, becoming, having fun, traveling, making friends, fulfilling callings, working, developing hobbies and skills and ultimately, becoming who Heavenly Father knows you can become through righteous living. 

• Click here to watch my 3 Months Down Video :)

• Overall, I am so happy, and loving life. Jared is amazing. So dedicated to the work, I've never heard him complain, and he is loving the people. He writes the most loving emails, along with amazing stories and spiritual experiences. He never breaks the rules, and he's just basically the perfect missionary :) I couldn't have asked for a better boyfriend/missionary. I couldn't have asked for a better experience in my life. Waiting is hard, but amazing at the same time. We're both growing so much and I've seen it bless our relationship tremendously. Basically, I got this :) 4 down, 20 to go! 

I Miss Us

I decided that I'm randomly going to start doing throwback Thursdays here on my blog.
(yaayyyy)

This is the second to last video we spontaneously recorded before he left. We were trying to act as each other. So, I was saying stuff Jared would always say, and he was saying stuff that I always say. Ignore the fact that we're just really weird people..

This is the very first video I ever made of Jared and I together. Half the videos were taken before we even started dating. The second song in the video pretty accurately describes how I was feeling at the time. This video also contains our first "on screen" kiss. HA, I totally laugh at it now but I was sooooo nervous to kiss him in front of the camera. You can see at 2:46 that he kinda says, "Forget the camera is even there" Oh good times. These are the good ole days here. So these are over a year old, all filmed in Hawaii.  Thanks for reading/watching :) Come on, you know you enjoyed it. Sometimes I go through and watch all these old videos on days when I'm really missing him. Videos have been my life saver.

Airport Phone Call from Jared!!

Girls, today was the big day. The day Jared got to call from the airport! :)

I'd by lying if I said I wasn't totally freaking out. I seriously could not sleep last night. I woke up at 5:14, 6:30, 7:02, 7:15, 7:45 and my alarm finally went off at 7:55. I guess you could say I was like a child on Christmas Eve. The stressful thing was that I had to spend my morning studying for a geology final. My final started at 11:00 and his plane was scheduled to leave at 11:15 so I was hoping he'd call me before my test. I was freaking out because by 10:30 he still hadn't called me. Apparently Heavenly Father is still trying to teach me patience. Basically.. Just watch this video and you'll see :)

We only got to talk for three minutes because there were so many missionaries who still needed to call their families. But it didn't matter, just hearing his voice tell me he loved me was all I needed to hear :) I'm just so excited that he'll finally be in Italy! I feel like these past six weeks he hasn't even really been on a mission. I feel like the mission really beings when they start teaching :) I can't wait to hear stories about the people, culture, investigators, his mission president, the wards, the members, and the FOOD! I know he's going to put his whole heart and soul into serving the people of Italy. He already has such a deep love for them and he's not even there yet <3 Like I mentioned, he left this morning at 11:15 and flew to Chicago where he arrived at 3:15 their time, and then he had a flight to London at 5:15. So as I type this, he's flying over the ocean and will land in London at 6:50am and then he'll have one more flight leaving at 8:35 for Rome where he'll arrive at 12:05pm :) He's going to be one tired missionary.  I just love him so much and can't wait to begin the next part of our best two years :) 

<3

Exactly How I Feel

I'm So In Love :)

Sometimes I have nights where I just sit here and think, "I'm so blessed, and so lucky to have Jared in my life." I thought I knew what true love was. But I honestly didn't know this level of love existed until I met Jared. For me, true love is when you can look at the person and just know that you love them, no matter what. Having no doubts, just knowing that your love for the person is stronger than anything else. Is true love perfect? Of course not. I used to think that love was about always being happy together and never arguing. While dating Jared, I realized I was wrong. Do we argue? Yes. But you know what? It makes us stronger. Jared challenges me. I used to think that maybe our personalities didn't match up. I realized though that our personalities didn't have to be perfect together. He challenges my weaknesses and helps me grow. The best kind of love is the kind that makes you a better person, without changing you into someone other than yourself.

I've never felt so comfortable with someone before. Not once have I ever felt embarrassed for being, well, me. As a matter of fact, he specifically loves the things about me that I used to try and hide. I can be hyper in front of him, I can cry when dogs die in movies, I don't have to worry about upsetting him by pulling out my camera to film him every 10 minutes, I can even dance in front of him (I'm a terrible dancer. Seriously). Jared builds me up unlike anyone ever has. I've never felt so confident in myself as I do when I'm around Jared. And let's be honest, I've a very needy person. I'm overly sensitive, emotional beyond belief, and super needy. Basically everything a good girlfriend shouldn't be. In past relationships I found myself constantly doing for them, what I secretly wished they were doing for me. I realized that sometimes I'd expect more from others because I'd be willing to do that much for them. But with Jared, I don't "expect" anything. The way we show each other love is so perfect. He loves me in ways that I feel loved, and I love him in ways that I know he feels loved. For example, he takes hundreds of pictures with me. He'll stay up at night with me and we'll just talk, for hours and cuddle. He'll randomly buy my flowers and chocolate. We'll slow dance to absolutely no music. He'll tell me every time he sees me without makeup, how beautiful he thinks I am. It was just the little things that make me feel so loved. But ultimately, he respects me. He is always a gentleman, and he's a worthy Priesthood holder. And that's what I love more than anything. 

I just love so much about that boy. It's kind of ridiculous :)

•  I love his testimony and desire to serve the Lord and keep the commandments. 
• I love that I know he's going to be a wonderful dad someday. He's so good with kids :) 
• I love that he's a hopeless romantic. Maybe even more so than I am <3
• I love that he's not the least bit controlling. When you truly love someone, you don't try to control them. 
• I love that he is ambitious. He has so many goals, hopes and dreams.
• I love that he would start random spontaneous water gun fights with me outside the cafeteria in Hawaii <3
• I love that he reads Dr. Seuss books to me when I'm not feeling well :) 
• I love that sometimes he'd tuck me in and tell me bedtime stories :)
• I love that he genuinely becomes interested in stuff that I'm interested in. (i.e. Pretty Little Liars, Taylor Swift, filming videos, etc..)
• I love that he's so talented. Guitar, cooking, snowboarding, singing, writing songs, long boarding, surfing, dancing, etc..
• I love that we both eat the entire sunflower seed, including the shell :) 
• I love how well he understands and knows me. He just gets me :)
• I love that whenever we make cookies, he saves me a little dough, puts it in a bag, and puts it in the fridge for me to eat later :) 
• I love that he's opinionated. We can discuss/debate about anything. Politics, beliefs, parenting tactics, or simply our opinions of a movie we recently watched.
• I love that he's outgoing. Unlike me. He's everything I'm not :) 
• I love that he'd come over to visit me at 12:45am after getting off work, driving 15 minutes one way to drop a friend off, then driving 25 minutes the opposite direction just to hug me for 5 minutes, and then 20 minutes back home. 
• I love that he'll randomly stand up in the middle of a movie, leave the room, and come back 5 minutes later and sits a bowl of popcorn in my lap. He just knows me so well :) 
• I love that he holds my hand during prayers.
• I love that he stands up for me.
• I love that he wears purple just because he knows it's my favorite color.
• I love that we do pinky promises <3
• I love that he has always been so patient with me. Whenever I had doubts about our relationship, he never gave up on me. 
• I love that he's excited to adopt a little girl from China someday <3
• I love that when I know he's having anxiety, or is just stressed out, all I have to do is pull him close and hug him. 
• I love that we did FHE together, just us :)
• I love that he's the only person who can make me feel this way <3

I love that he is my best friend. The person I can tell everything to. The person who will pull the hair out of my eyes when I cry, and wipe away my tears. He's the person who will stand there and wrap his arms around me to let me know he's there for me and never letting go. He's the one who will call me in the middle of the night just to tell me he loves me. He's the person I can have fun doing anything with. Whether it's surfing in Hawaii, or laying on my couch just talking. We still have just as much fun and enjoy being with each other no matter what we're doing.

I'm so grateful for his decision to serve a mission and serve the Lord for these two years. I'm grateful to know that a love like this doesn't just go away, or change. It's something that will continue to grow stronger the longer we are apart. I know that to be true because it already has :) Basically.. I love Jared Lee Burnham. Basically, this is how I feel.

<3

Emails & Letters :)

I always knew that Jared would most likely not be allowed to email me at all during his mission. At least, that's what I tried to prepare myself for. I didn't want to get my hopes up. Low and behold, I woke up on the morning of his first pday in the MTC and his name popped up with an email from him! I totally freaked out :D

How lucky am I that the week he entered the MTC is the week they changed the rules about emailing? I feel so blessed :) I'm so proud of Jared. He's been in the MTC for 3 weeks now and is working so hard on learning the language and how to be a missionary. He's one of the most dedicated and hard working people I know. He's so obedient and follows all the rules. I know that being an obedient missionary will bless him in ways I can't even describe. 

On his second pday, I got his email in the morning and was happy about it :) Little did I know that I'd receive another email from him at 5:00! I was so surprised :) It's little things like that just totally make my day. Apparently he didn't use up all of his time in the morning and got to use the rest of it at 5:00. 

I was super excited this past week to tell him that I'll be living in Italy this summer :) He had no idea that I applied or anything. I asked him in a Dear Elder how he would feel if I did apply, and this is what he said, 

"I think you should definitely go to Italy if that is what you want to do.  I mean, why not?!  How cool would it be if we both could at least speak some Italian when I got back?  And I know you love Italy and you love teaching...It's the perfect combination :D Just follow your dreams Desiree.  Although, I am so glad you still asked for my opinion. That makes me very happy to know that we are still that close and you still consider me your closest and best friend...because you are definitely mine! :D :D"

<3

Now I feel even better about spending my summer working in Italy. I love that he's supportive and wants me to follow my dreams no matter what. That's just one of the many things I love about him :) To sum things up, he's loving it in the MTC but can't wait to finally start teaching in Italy. We're both happy and we love receiving letters from each other :) 

One Week Down :)

What a crazy emotional week this has been. 

Honestly though, it's been easier than it was two years ago when I sent my first missionary out. Like I previously mentioned, everything is different this time. The goodbye was 1273855947 billion times harder, but the first week has been easier. I'll admit, I cried my eyes out the first day. And the second.. I was just so unproductive. I couldn't do anything. Eat, homework, or even watch movies. I was dead to the world. And I don't think I ate anything for the first 2 1/2 days. My appetite was completely gone. But then I went to my Heavenly Father in sincere prayer. Since then, I've felt nothing but peace and happiness. You probably don't believe me. But I honestly haven't felt sad since those first two days. I miss him like crazy, yes. But sad? Not so much :) 

Let me jump back for a second. Jared called me Wednesday morning to say a final "see you later" and that was it. I started driving the 3 1/2 hours back to school. When I finally got back I looked at my phone and saw this:

TEARS. Yes, lots of them. I love him so much :) 

I couldn't wait so I sent him a letter on Thursday. I seriously forgot how much I love writing letters.

I was only down at school for Wednesday and Thursday and went back home for the weekend on Friday. I had the awesome opportunity of going to my first MG party of this wait on Saturday! :) I don't have any pictures, but it was so fun. I loved being around other girls who felt the exact same way as me. For any of you girls who have never been to a party with MG's, GO! They really help :) 

On Sunday I was SO happy because Jared's mom sent me this!

The first picture of him! It totally made my day :)

It's always hard when they first go into the MTC because you don't know how well they're doing. This picture put some of my worries to ease. He looks so happy, and that makes me happy :) 

Alright, so this is when the best part happens. Yesterday (Tuesday) I was walking past the mailroom and I thought to myself, "Don't go check for a letter. You know there won't be one. He's only been in the MTC for 6 days and hasn't even had his first pday. There's no way there'd be a letter" But I decided to check anyway. I opened my little box, and to my utter surprise, I saw this!

My reaction:

Wanna know the dumbest part though? The date on this letter says it was sent out the 21st. Aka the day after Jared entered the MTC. Aka 5 days ago. Which means it'd been sitting in my mailbox for a few days. JUST SITTING THERE! I never checked the mail earlier cuz I knew nothing would be there. Just goes to show how wrong I was. He wrote this letter on his first day in the MTC and it was amazing :) He's doing great and loving the MTC. Although he's still getting used to being followed to the bathroom :) 

This first week has been crazy. But I'm glad and relieved to say the first/hardest week is over : ) 

Here's some of my advice: PRAY! Whenever you feel like things are so hard you can't handle it. Looks for ways to be happy :) For example, this Joshua Radin song came out yesterday and made me think, "Today is one of those days where nothing can go wrong" I am so blessed and am very excited to continue on this journey :) If Heavenly Father brings you to it, he'll bring you through it :) 

Quote for the Day: "Don't let Satan put a question mark where God has already put a period."

(now enjoy this awesome Joshua Radin song)