Honestly though, it's been easier than it was two years ago when I sent my first missionary out. Like I previously mentioned, everything is different this time. The goodbye was 1273855947 billion times harder, but the first week has been easier. I'll admit, I cried my eyes out the first day. And the second.. I was just so unproductive. I couldn't do anything. Eat, homework, or even watch movies. I was dead to the world. And I don't think I ate anything for the first 2 1/2 days. My appetite was completely gone. But then I went to my Heavenly Father in sincere prayer. Since then, I've felt nothing but peace and happiness. You probably don't believe me. But I honestly haven't felt sad since those first two days. I miss him like crazy, yes. But sad? Not so much :)
Let me jump back for a second. Jared called me Wednesday morning to say a final "see you later" and that was it. I started driving the 3 1/2 hours back to school. When I finally got back I looked at my phone and saw this:
TEARS. Yes, lots of them. I love him so much :)
I couldn't wait so I sent him a letter on Thursday. I seriously forgot how much I love writing letters.
I was only down at school for Wednesday and Thursday and went back home for the weekend on Friday. I had the awesome opportunity of going to my first MG party of this wait on Saturday! :) I don't have any pictures, but it was so fun. I loved being around other girls who felt the exact same way as me. For any of you girls who have never been to a party with MG's, GO! They really help :)
On Sunday I was SO happy because Jared's mom sent me this!
The first picture of him! It totally made my day :)
It's always hard when they first go into the MTC because you don't know how well they're doing. This picture put some of my worries to ease. He looks so happy, and that makes me happy :)
Alright, so this is when the best part happens. Yesterday (Tuesday) I was walking past the mailroom and I thought to myself, "Don't go check for a letter. You know there won't be one. He's only been in the MTC for 6 days and hasn't even had his first pday. There's no way there'd be a letter" But I decided to check anyway. I opened my little box, and to my utter surprise, I saw this!
Wanna know the dumbest part though? The date on this letter says it was sent out the 21st. Aka the day after Jared entered the MTC. Aka 5 days ago. Which means it'd been sitting in my mailbox for a few days. JUST SITTING THERE! I never checked the mail earlier cuz I knew nothing would be there. Just goes to show how wrong I was. He wrote this letter on his first day in the MTC and it was amazing :) He's doing great and loving the MTC. Although he's still getting used to being followed to the bathroom :)
This first week has been crazy. But I'm glad and relieved to say the first/hardest week is over : )
Here's some of my advice: PRAY! Whenever you feel like things are so hard you can't handle it. Looks for ways to be happy :) For example, this Joshua Radin song came out yesterday and made me think, "Today is one of those days where nothing can go wrong" I am so blessed and am very excited to continue on this journey :) If Heavenly Father brings you to it, he'll bring you through it :)
Quote for the Day:"Don't let Satan put a question mark where God has already put a period."
I am happy to say that Jared is officially in the MTC as of 4 days ago :)
I don't even know where to start. Jared's farewell was a week ago today. I remember him telling me how nervous and scared he was to speak in front of so many people. He told me not to expect anything good. But of course, he totally surprised us all. His talk was absolutely amazing and I'm sure everyone in the congregation felt the spirit just as strong as I did. Afterwards, we all went to his house and he said goodbye to some friends. Oh also, the day of his farewell was also St. Patricks day :)
That day was wonderful and happy :) We hardly left each others sides. We both knew he was needing to get ready to enter the MTC, but at the same time, we continued to act completely normal around each other. I'd walk away for a minute to talk to someone and he'd come over and say, "Hey, you were too far away from me :)"
Then we had our last day together on Tuesday. It was amazing to say the least. I went over to his house and helped him pack some last minute items. We then played pool and made some yummy food. The weather was nice (thankfully) so we decided to go on a walk at a park we'd always go to during the winter. We'd go at night and buy hot chocolate and then go walk around the park. As we were walking he started talking about leaving and I told him he needed to stop because I could feel the tears coming. I didn't want to talk about him being gone. All I wanted to do was focus on my time left with him. After our walk, we drove to my house :) We decided to watch The Best Two Years outside with blankets on my trampoline as the sun was setting. It was perfect :)
After the movie we went inside and sat in my room. We knew we only had 45 minutes left together. Jared said, "Come here, let's just cuddle for a little while. I know it's your favorite" so we did :) We didn't really talk, we just sat there in each others arms. We eventually started talking about our future, me waiting, his mission, and old memories :) He wanted to see me smile so he kept bringing up old memories from us together in Hawaii.
Eventually the time came. It was 8:00 and he needed to go home to get set apart. I started crying, and I didn't even know what to say. We were hugging for a while and I said, "Any final words?" Jared waited for a second and said, "I love you. There's nothing else I can say" and then he started to tear up and by that point I was completely bawling. We stood by my front door for what seemed like a lifetime. We had one last kiss, well technically 3. We kiss in 3's :) And then I said, "Sweetheart, you need to go.." so we walked to the door and I double pinky promised him that I'd wait :) I hugged him one last time. It was hard to get the words out through my crying, but said "You're going to be an amazing missionary." He was so emotional which was making it harder for me. So then he walked outside but just stood there looking at me. So I ran out and hugged him one last time and then stood in the doorway as I watched him walk away, realizing I needed to capture this and remember it forever. We did the "I love you" sign before he started to drive away. I came inside with my hand over my mouth, trying to keep my crying and breathing under control.
This goodbye was SO much harder than it was with my first missionary. It's crazy. But I couldn't be more proud of my sweetheart. I know we'll both be blessed. I've come to realize that we were seriously created for each other and I love him more than I ever thought I could. Plus, I'm happy to finally consider myself a missionary girlfriend again :) Wish me luck for the next two years! <3
I can't believe that one week from tonight, I'll be saying "see you later" to my best friend. It's really starting to hit me. For a while I'd just been excited to start spring break and be with Jared again. But now that spring break has started and we've spent time together, I'm finally starting to realize how quickly time is going. You'd think that I'd already know this since I've said goodbye to a missionary before. A little over two years ago actually.. But the thing is, It's totally different this time. I don't know how to explain it. I just know, this time is different. He's different :) Different than anyone I've ever known.
It's 1:57am and I just got done watching The Bachelor finale. I know this is going to sound super cheesy, but just watching Sean pick Catherine and everything that happened, just makes me see how Jared seriously is the one for me. I used to watch shows like that and think, "Aw, they're so in love. I want a guy like that." I can honestly say, I have someone BETTER than that. I have a relationship BETTER than that. I was never able to say that before :) He's truly my best friend. He's my rock and anchor in this crazy life. He's the person I want to spend every day with. He loves me unconditionally and shows me in a million ways every day. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I could go on and on.
In the lyrics of our song it says, "When God made you, he must have been thinking about me." Those lyrics could not be any more true. He's the one. I just know it :) Now gone are all my questions about why, and I've never been so sure of anything in my life :)
(our song = When God Made You - Newsong ft. Natalie Grant)
I just want to let you all know that I am now selling bows on my etsy website. I started making them as a hobby, but then more and more people started to ask if they could buy them from me. So now, I have my own little online shop!
The bows are very good quality and I spend a lot of time on them. In addition, they are pretty stinkin' cheap compared to the rest of the bows sold on etsy.
Here are some pictures :)
And here is what my little shop looks like :) Please check it out! If you have any requests for patterns or fabric, I'd be happy to make a custom one for you. I'm actually trying to find a pattern with the Italian flag colors... Look at me, Jared isn't even gone yet and I'm already acting like a crazy MG. Anyway, here's what the website looks like. Go to the link HERE to check it out :)
Again.. I fail at blogging. I'm going to throw a ton of pictures out there just to catch up time. So here we go :)
I like to have pictures taken of us once every season. Of course, I can't afford a photographer so I have to give my camera to my little sister and attempt to edit the pictures myself. I wish more than anything that I had a nice camera. The Canon T3i is will be my next big spend as soon as I get enough money.
He bought me the most amazing Christmas presents :) First off, purple is my favorite color. Taylor Swift is my favorite artist, I needed new perfume and it's purple. How perfect is that? He also got me the little puppy because he couldn't get me a real one before he left. And finally, he got a necklace with a "J" on it :) I love it all!!
My first carriage ride! :)
Eating Breaking on Christmas Eve at Kneaders :)
Since i'm not so good at writing, I put together videos that show how my Christmas break went :)
Lastly, New Years Eve!
We spent our morning watching New Years Eve (the movie) and started out night off at the Provo Mall.
We then went over to a YSA dance :)
We ended our night at Ihop where creeper friends took pictures of us ;)
Phew, now that I'm somewhat caught up, I can finally start blogging again :)