I'm So In Love :)

Sometimes I have nights where I just sit here and think, "I'm so blessed, and so lucky to have Jared in my life." I thought I knew what true love was. But I honestly didn't know this level of love existed until I met Jared. For me, true love is when you can look at the person and just know that you love them, no matter what. Having no doubts, just knowing that your love for the person is stronger than anything else. Is true love perfect? Of course not. I used to think that love was about always being happy together and never arguing. While dating Jared, I realized I was wrong. Do we argue? Yes. But you know what? It makes us stronger. Jared challenges me. I used to think that maybe our personalities didn't match up. I realized though that our personalities didn't have to be perfect together. He challenges my weaknesses and helps me grow. The best kind of love is the kind that makes you a better person, without changing you into someone other than yourself.

I've never felt so comfortable with someone before. Not once have I ever felt embarrassed for being, well, me. As a matter of fact, he specifically loves the things about me that I used to try and hide. I can be hyper in front of him, I can cry when dogs die in movies, I don't have to worry about upsetting him by pulling out my camera to film him every 10 minutes, I can even dance in front of him (I'm a terrible dancer. Seriously). Jared builds me up unlike anyone ever has. I've never felt so confident in myself as I do when I'm around Jared. And let's be honest, I've a very needy person. I'm overly sensitive, emotional beyond belief, and super needy. Basically everything a good girlfriend shouldn't be. In past relationships I found myself constantly doing for them, what I secretly wished they were doing for me. I realized that sometimes I'd expect more from others because I'd be willing to do that much for them. But with Jared, I don't "expect" anything. The way we show each other love is so perfect. He loves me in ways that I feel loved, and I love him in ways that I know he feels loved. For example, he takes hundreds of pictures with me. He'll stay up at night with me and we'll just talk, for hours and cuddle. He'll randomly buy my flowers and chocolate. We'll slow dance to absolutely no music. He'll tell me every time he sees me without makeup, how beautiful he thinks I am. It was just the little things that make me feel so loved. But ultimately, he respects me. He is always a gentleman, and he's a worthy Priesthood holder. And that's what I love more than anything. 

I just love so much about that boy. It's kind of ridiculous :)

•  I love his testimony and desire to serve the Lord and keep the commandments. 
• I love that I know he's going to be a wonderful dad someday. He's so good with kids :) 
• I love that he's a hopeless romantic. Maybe even more so than I am <3
• I love that he's not the least bit controlling. When you truly love someone, you don't try to control them. 
• I love that he is ambitious. He has so many goals, hopes and dreams.
• I love that he would start random spontaneous water gun fights with me outside the cafeteria in Hawaii <3
• I love that he reads Dr. Seuss books to me when I'm not feeling well :) 
• I love that sometimes he'd tuck me in and tell me bedtime stories :)
• I love that he genuinely becomes interested in stuff that I'm interested in. (i.e. Pretty Little Liars, Taylor Swift, filming videos, etc..)
• I love that he's so talented. Guitar, cooking, snowboarding, singing, writing songs, long boarding, surfing, dancing, etc..
• I love that we both eat the entire sunflower seed, including the shell :) 
• I love how well he understands and knows me. He just gets me :)
• I love that whenever we make cookies, he saves me a little dough, puts it in a bag, and puts it in the fridge for me to eat later :) 
• I love that he's opinionated. We can discuss/debate about anything. Politics, beliefs, parenting tactics, or simply our opinions of a movie we recently watched.
• I love that he's outgoing. Unlike me. He's everything I'm not :) 
• I love that he'd come over to visit me at 12:45am after getting off work, driving 15 minutes one way to drop a friend off, then driving 25 minutes the opposite direction just to hug me for 5 minutes, and then 20 minutes back home. 
• I love that he'll randomly stand up in the middle of a movie, leave the room, and come back 5 minutes later and sits a bowl of popcorn in my lap. He just knows me so well :) 
• I love that he holds my hand during prayers.
• I love that he stands up for me.
• I love that he wears purple just because he knows it's my favorite color.
• I love that we do pinky promises <3
• I love that he has always been so patient with me. Whenever I had doubts about our relationship, he never gave up on me. 
• I love that he's excited to adopt a little girl from China someday <3
• I love that when I know he's having anxiety, or is just stressed out, all I have to do is pull him close and hug him. 
• I love that we did FHE together, just us :)
• I love that he's the only person who can make me feel this way <3

I love that he is my best friend. The person I can tell everything to. The person who will pull the hair out of my eyes when I cry, and wipe away my tears. He's the person who will stand there and wrap his arms around me to let me know he's there for me and never letting go. He's the one who will call me in the middle of the night just to tell me he loves me. He's the person I can have fun doing anything with. Whether it's surfing in Hawaii, or laying on my couch just talking. We still have just as much fun and enjoy being with each other no matter what we're doing.

I'm so grateful for his decision to serve a mission and serve the Lord for these two years. I'm grateful to know that a love like this doesn't just go away, or change. It's something that will continue to grow stronger the longer we are apart. I know that to be true because it already has :) Basically.. I love Jared Lee Burnham. Basically, this is how I feel.

<3